Rawesome ELE Application
by Ellsie Kai
Summary: So many applications went into the Evil League of Evil for their newest members. Here is the transcript form one of those Super Villain's videos. Rawesome is ready to take on the world and their arch nemesis. Read on to learn about this feisty duo.


**Rawesome **

**ELE Application**

_Open on two twenty-something _

_year old girls whispering to each _

_other as one types on the keyboard._

**Prof**- (_typing_) I know, he was HOT, right? (_looking up at camera_) Oh shh! We're on. (_to_ _camera_) Good evening, Bad Horse and all League members.

**Col**- (_sitting up straight_) Hi.

**Prof**- This is our Official Application to the Evil League of Evil.

**Col**- I am Colonel Raw.

**Prof**- And I am Professor Awesome. Together we are...

**Both**- (_bump_ _fists_) Rawesome

**Col**- And this (_motioning around them_) is our secret lair. Otherwise known as Professor Awesome's guest boudoir.

_The Professor elbows the Colonel. _

_And whispers angrily to her. They _

_begin to whisper fight and then _

_abruptly stopped._

**Prof**- Okay, I know what you're thinking. "Hey, that Professor... looks familiar. Didn't she apply before?" (_sighs_) The answer is, "Yes". I am the villain formally known as Rina Riot.

**Col**- (_mock salesman style_) Why, Professor, what happened to "Rina"?

**Prof**- (_mock salesman style_) That's a good question, Colonel. (_they stare at the camera with smiles_) Gather 'round children and I will tel you the story of "Rina Riot". About three years ago, "Rina" was partnered with one Miss Mary Mayhem and we ran this city.

**Col**- (_quietly_) In a quiet, subdued, almost not hears of kind of way.

**Prof**- RAW!! Come on! (_elbows again_)

**Col**- (_clueless_) What? Even I didn't know you were a (_finger quotation marks_) "villain" and I'm your sister.

_The Professor slaps down the _

_Colonel's hands. They whisper _

_argue again. Stop._

**Col**- (_exaggeratedly_) Anyhoo!

**Prof**- (_brushing her hair back_) Right, yes, back to my story. Mary and I would cause commotion wherever we went and while everyone was busy we would do our evil deeds. (_whispering into the camera_) FYI, some of those deeds helped pay for this current lair of mine.

_The Colonel coughs._

**Prof**- (_stammers_) Our lair. This current lair of ours.

**Col**- Yea, you better correct yourself, (_rolls eyes_) _Professor_.

**Prof**- (_shakes_ _head_) But alas, Mary Mayhem decided that evil was... well, evil and abandoned our cause and turned herself in. And now she's been taken under the wing of the "oh-so-good" and just another lap dog to the US commercial mill known as the "Side of Good".

_Her voice rising the whole time in _

_anger and uses her fingers to _

_emphasize the ridiculousness of it. _

_The Colonel rubs her shoulder to calm _

_her down._

**Col**- Right, okay. (_to the Professor_) You okay? (_she_ _nods_) Okay, um, yea, so now Mary Mayhem is Mary Vigilante. The Professor's arch nemesis.

**Prof**- (_head snaps up_) Damn right! I had to leave the city and change my name just so I could regroup.

**Col**- (_whispers to camera_) Meaning she came home.

_They whisper argue again. Stop._

**Col**- What I meant was, the Professor went back to find herself, her new self. Where all this (_hand scanning the Professor_) started. (_smiles_) Where we started.

**Prof**- (_calm now_) Yes. Back I went to my childhood home and though you may think it's a little lame just know that my folks are pretty kick ass. (_shrugs_) They're rouge CIA agents.

_The Colonel leans back and shakes _

_her head 'No'. The Professor _

_doesn't realize. Colonel then _

_reaches out and types. "Dentists" _

_appears on screen._

**Prof**- (_to her typing_) What are you doing?

**Col**- (_flustered_) Um... just making sure the saturation is good. I know you don't want to look like a crazy red head in front of the ELE.

**Prof**- (_nods_) True. (_back to the camera_) And while I was back home I realized all that I could become. I realized Mary "whatever she's into this week" was holding me back and that to be truly evil I had to (_stands_) become more than "Rina Riot"!

**Col**- (_leaning toward the camera_) You're out of the shot.

**Prof**- (_moment_) Sorry. (_sits, embarrassed_)

**Col**- Let's keep going, shall we?

**Prof**- Yes (_runs hands through hair_) we shall. Back home I decided to better myself and my resolve. I studied the evil doers of yester-years and all the Physics used in the fight against all others. (**shyly**) I guess you can say I have a PhD in Horribleness.

_Quietly, the Colonel holds up a _

_t-shirt with Dr Horrible's face on it._

**Col**- (_behind shirt_) Big fans.

_The Colonel comes from around _

_the shirt and kisses Dr Horrible's _

_likeness._

**Prof**- (_dreamy_) Yea. (_second_) Um, right. I guess that takes us to Colonel Raw's story.

**Col**- (_smiles big_) That's me! (_casually_) Basically, I'm the "muscle" of this operation. I have a black belt in several martial art forms. (_holds her hand around her mouth_) Thank you, avoiding regular Junior High Phys Ed.

**Prof**- (_slaps her arm_) Would you take this seriously?!

_They whisper argue, Stop._

**Col**- I am also a master of disguise.

**Prof**- A demonstration?

**Col**- Of course. (_they stare at the camera with smiles_) Say the Professor and I are planning a little heist and there's a little Miss "I'll call for help" in the room and she decides to (_a second_) call for help. She's going to need a little persuasion to put down her phone, isn't she?

_The Colonel ducks off screen only _

_to appear seconds later, now a man _

_wearing a nice suit with a _

_charming British accent._

**Col**- (_as man_) Miss, the safest thing to do now is what they say. They won't hurt us if we cooperate, don't be a hero.

_The Colonel ducks off screen _

_again and comes back seconds _

_later as herself._

**Prof**- And that's only one of her characters.

**Col**- I call him Lord Randall. (_starts counting on fingers_) Then there's Adam Benson Jr: he's a yuppy college kid; and Mrs. Jenkins: she's a local deli owners and knows her faults; and Madam Noxon: she's a respected dominatrix with a heart of gold. Oh! And of course there's (_long high-pitched beep over the Colonel's voice_)

**Prof**- (_elbows_) I can't believe you just used your real name. That is _not_ one of your characters!

**Col**- (_upset_) Well, they wouldn't have known it was my real name if you didn't just out me!

_They whisper argue. Stop._

**Prof**- I guess we can edit that out later.

**Col**- (_clears throat_) Obviously, our little Super Villain duo still has a few kinks to work out.

**Prof**- (_loudly_) But that's sisters for you, huh? (_chuckles, embarrassed_) So that's our story, or should we say, the beginning of our story. All Rawesome is missing is the allies of the ELE.

**Col**- And to be honest, that is everything to us. (_Professor nods_) Here we are, Rawesome (_quietly fist bump_) and our official application to the Evil League of Evil.

**Prof**- We ask you, in all your evil glory, consider us for the League. There's nothing like the backing of the thorough-bred of sin to scare Mary Vigilante straight.

**Col**- (_whispers_) Or crocked, I'd guess.

**Prof**- (_whispers_) Well, good or bad, we are right.

**Col**- (_nods_) True. Good point. (_to camera_) Yea, okay, so thanks, I guess, for your time.

**Prof**- Yes! Thank you. And we hope to see you all soon. I mean, even if you don't pick us (_both snicker in disbelief_) the annual Super Villain Masquerade is coming up.

_The Professor and Colonel _

_salute to camera._

**Col**- Good evening, ELE and Bad Horse.

**Prof**- Thanks for all the encouragement a villain could ask for.

**Col**- Again, I am Colonel Raw.

**Prof**- And I'm Professor Awesome.

**Both**- Together we are (_fist bump_) Rawesome.

_The Professor types something _

_and the screen goes black._


End file.
